How to Help Aging Parents

Updated August 7, 2025 | Lisbeth Cano

Table of Contents

Caring for aging parents is a significant responsibility. It involves recognizing their changing needs, communicating openly, and setting up appropriate support systems.

This guide offers practical steps to help you navigate this important journey.

How to Recognize When Aging Parents Need Help

The first step in helping your parents is understanding when they might need assistance. Signs are not always obvious but can suggest declining independence or health.

Watch for Changes in Daily Habits

Look for patterns such as:

  • Difficulty with personal hygiene
  • Missed medication doses or confusion with pills
  • An increasingly cluttered or unsafe home
  • Trouble managing money or bills

“Some of the signs that your parent may need help include problems with everyday items such as managing money, shopping, grooming or cleaning.” — Mayo Clinic1

Monitor Mental and Physical Health Changes

Take note of:

  • Memory loss or confusion
  • Mood shifts, depression, or anxiety
  • Loss of balance or decreased mobility

These may impact their ability to live safely at home.

Consider a Professional Assessment

Schedule an evaluation with a doctor or geriatric specialist. They can assess physical and mental capabilities to help determine the level of care needed.

Stay Informed from Afar

If you're not nearby, stay connected through:

  • Regular phone or video calls
  • Periodic visits
  • Updates from neighbors or local relatives

“When you don't live close by, it may take more effort to find out what's going on and stay up to date with an older person's needs.” — NIA2

How to Communicate Effectively With Aging Parents

Good communication helps build trust, ease concerns, and make decisions together.

Approach Conversations with Care

Choose the right moment and setting. Speak with compassion, not criticism. Focus on safety and support, not control.

Handle Resistance Gracefully

It’s not unusual for loved ones to resist help. They often fear losing independence.

“Conflicts often arise when parents resist help, threatening relationships just when understanding and support are most needed.” — AARP3

Offer choices and keep reinforcing that your goal is to help preserve their well-being.

Respect Their Autonomy

Involve your parents in every decision about care. Prioritize their voice, even when you see risks. This honors their dignity.

Encourage Advance Planning Conversations

Help guide discussions around:

  • Living wills
  • Healthcare proxies
  • Power of attorney for finances

These ensure their choices are respected in the future.

How to Create a Safe and Supportive Home Environment

Creating a living space that supports safety, comfort, and independence is key.

Promote Aging in Place with Simple Modifications

  • Add grab bars in bathrooms
  • Improve lighting and eliminate tripping hazards
  • Install stairlifts or ramps if needed
  • Use emergency alert systems

“Many people want the same things as they get older: to stay in their own homes, to maintain independence for as long as possible…” — NIA4

Explore aging-in-place resources and consider home safety tips.

Use In-Home Services and Community Resources

Explore local offerings like:

  • Personal care aides
  • Meal delivery services
  • Transportation assistance
  • Community senior centers

“There are many types of services available to help meet the long-term care needs of an older person living at home.” — NIA5

Evaluate Long-Term Care Facilities When Needed

If remaining at home isn't safe, options include:

  • Assisted living facilities
  • Nursing homes
  • Memory care units

Learn more about assisted living and finding senior housing options

How to Share Caregiving Responsibilities

Sharing the workload helps avoid burnout and keeps care consistent.

Support the Primary Caregiver

Help by:

  • Taking on tasks where possible
  • Offering emotional support
  • Recognizing signs of burnout

Read tips on avoiding caregiver burnout

Divide Duties with Siblings and Family

Use calendars or apps to delegate:

  • Doctor’s appointments
  • Meal prep or grocery runs
  • Bill management
  • Weekend check-ins

See advice on caregiving with siblings

Use Respite Care and Support Groups

  • Respite care lets the main caregiver take a break
  • Local or online support groups provide emotional relief

Find caregiver support options

Manage Caregiver Stress With Self-Care

“Caregivers report higher levels of stress than do people who are not caregivers.” — Mayo Clinic6
“To be an effective caregiver, you must take care of yourself. The person you are caring for is counting on you.” — CDC7

Practice:

  • Regular sleep and exercise
  • Stress management techniques
  • Scheduling guilt-free downtime

How to Plan for the Future

Proactive planning reduces uncertainty and enables smoother transitions.

Prepare for Long-Term Financial and Legal Needs

Review:

  • Long-term care insurance options
  • Medicaid and Medicare benefits
  • Estate plans and wills

Get help with financial planning
Review estate planning tips

Make Health and Living Decisions Early

Ask:

  • Where do they want to live if their needs increase?
  • What medical interventions do they want or not want?

Document preferences so everyone is informed in advance.

Coordinate Across Providers and Services

Care often involves many players:

  • Primary care doctors
  • Specialists
  • Physical therapists
  • Social workers

Stay organized and keep information flowing across the team.

Create and Maintain a Care Plan

Build a plan that outlines:

  • Daily and weekly needs
  • Emergency contacts
  • Medication lists
  • Financial details

Review and update regularly to adjust for new needs.

Helping your aging parents is not only a responsibility — it’s a journey of care, respect, and love.

By recognizing changes early, communicating thoughtfully, setting up helpful systems, and preparing for what's ahead, you can support them in living with dignity and stability.

  1. https://newsnetwork.mayoclinic.org/discussion/what-you-should-know-about-caring-for-an-aging-parent/ ↩

  2. https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/long-distance-caregiving/what-long-distance-caregiving ↩

  3. https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/life-balance/when-aging-parents-resist-help/ ↩

  4. https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/aging-place/aging-place-growing-older-home ↩

  5. https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/caregiving/services-older-adults-living-home ↩

  6. https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/caregiver-stress/art-20044784 ↩

  7. https://www.cdc.gov/caregiving/caring-for-yourself/index.html ↩

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Lisbeth Cano Clinical Researcher and Elder Advocate

Meet the author: Lisbeth Cano earned her medical degree from Universidad de Iberoamérica in Costa Rica and worked as a doctor before becoming a clinical researcher. She now focuses on senior care, writing evidence-based guides for SeniorCanvas.com to help families make safer, smarter decisions for aging parents.